The day before my LAMDA audition I had received a letter in the post from Arts ED rejecting me from their course so I was not ready for that rejection and went into my second drama school audition with the first one hanging over my head.
My psychology during the LAMDA audition was, I’m not even going to bother… if I could get rejected so quickly when I felt like I was trying my hardest, then there was no point warming up, no point focusing and no point thinking I could do this because I obviously must have been so bad that my rejection letter was transcribed a day later!
So I arrived and everyone was sitting in the foyer. I sat with people I knew, began chatting and snacking on quavers trying to act like I didn’t give a toss about the outcome.
Then from the foyer a few names were called every 20mins(approx) and those people were lead through the school to a waiting area before you got into the various audition rooms.
Again, I was still putting on this act… chatting away, unfocused and nervous deep down.
Then my name was called and I walked into the audition room shitting myself because it just dawned on me that I was not prepared AT ALL! Usually I take some time to psyche myself up into a relaxed state before I throw myself into the deep end, but I knew I didn’t feel ready as I walked in this time. My ‘not caring’ approach had backfired.
After being greeted by the two gentlemen on the panel I was asked to stand on an x in the middle of the room and start when I was ready. All I have to say about that moment was CRINGE… how absolutely embarrassing!! I f***ed up hardcore and left with my head in my hands. GUTTED. I knew I had done the worst ever.
The next stage was having an interview with two ex-students in another interview room.
I walked in and had a brilliant interview, I find it easy to be myself so I wasn’t worried about that part of the process and it felt like the interview went really well.
Finally, it was time to go home and I knew that no matter how good my interview was it could never make up for how bad my acting audition had gone. Weeks later I got an email to say thank you but no thank you… Honestly, I saw it coming.
From this audition I took away the knowledge that you should always let rejection go and not let it affect your next auditions because I may have had a recall if I actually prepared myself before walking into the audition room instead of faffing around. Next time I will be much more prepared and that’s a promise I make to myself.
Don’t feel bad because it’s a no, be confident in yourself and keep it moving!